Thoughts on Maryland’s Latest Uniform Abomination
Give credit to Maryland on the gridiron, as they thumped Syracuse last Saturday. But those darn uniforms from a few weeks ago with the Star-Spangled Banner on them… the Confidential still cannot get over it. Just… look … at this abomination:
Even the shoes. Essentially tramping our national anthem! But it does make you wonder whether any other schools will rush to copy Maryland’s use of the written word on its uniform. And how.
The Constitution was written in Pennsylvania, so maybe Pitt could use that. And Virginia could claim the Declaration of Independence.
Perhaps Boston College and Notre Dame could find some sort of biblical passage to put onto their uniforms (hopefully not the cleats). However, the biblical message is not quite the same. As if the Beatitudes belong on a football field! One would have to think that it would be some Old Testament fury. Imagine BC wearing the story of David & Goliath before the next Florida State matchup:
48 As the Philistine moved closer to attack him, David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet him. 49 Reaching into his bag and taking out a stone, he slung it and struck the Philistine on the forehead. The stone sank into his forehead, and he fell facedown on the ground.
50 So David triumphed over the Philistine with a sling and a stone; without a sword in his hand he struck down the Philistine and killed him.
51 David ran and stood over him. He took hold of the Philistine’s sword and drew it from the sheath. After he killed him, he cut off his head with the sword. [Source.]
Hey, that could actually work. Pretty inspiring stuff. Again, let’s keep it off the cleats though.
Not sure what Notre Dame could do though. They are usually Goliath. Except when playing Alabama, of course.
Syracuse and Miami are each in the top 20 of private schools by Jewish population. Perhaps some more Torah/Old Testament fury.
What could other schools do? Give us some ideas…
The Confidential 
1. Maryland uniforms ARE an abomination.
2. Syracuse has no freeness of speech in this area.
Surprised you are not entering our Fantasy Football contest each week, Hokie Mark. What gives?
I think UM should put words from Fakin’ Like Gangsters on their uniform. Other schools can do the following:
FSU Can do random Creed songs or maybe some Morrison (both have ties to the area).
VT can either do Enter the Sandman (although UL may fight them on that), or I would prefer “Oops we did it again” in reference to their choking… or maybe that should go to Clemson??? To soon?
Duke can put up the words to “Its the end of the world and you know it,” as it is nuts how good they are now in football.
Obviously this is me joking with all these.
UNC could use one of the term papers that its student-athletes plagiarize…
UM’s uni’s have actually been creative, colorful, and sharpe looking. However, these are a bit bizarre… what’s the pin-wheel design
on the helmet?
The “pin wheel” design is the outline of Ft. McHenry which is where the Battle of Ft. McHenry took place during the War of 1812 and inspired Francis Scott Key. He wrote a poem (“Defence of Ft. McHenry) which tells the story of how the US defended the Fort which would later be set to music and become our national anthem.
Key was actually being held captive by the British during the battle and watched as the British navy bombarded Ft. McHenry, which protected the Chesapeake Bay. Throughout the night, and into the morning, the only way that he could tell what was happening was by the flashes from the bombs/mortars exploding at the fort and whether the US flag was still there – indicating that the fort had not fallen to the British.